No, no, no! Not again. This can’t be happening again! I had just scrubbed the floors – on my hands and knees, no less – now there is food flung everywhere. When I say everywhere, I mean it; yogurt is on the floor, the table, the walls, and even the ceiling.
We go through this over and over again. Food is for eating, not for throwing. My son is disciplined every time this happens – which is basically each time he eats – but nothing changes. On this night, I should have known better than to give him yogurt. It was supposed to be his post-bath, pre-bedtime snack but it turned into his post-first bath, pre-second bath snack. I take a deep breath and tell myself that I have to give him the chance to learn, no matter how many chances it may take. One day something will click and I will no longer have to scrub down our walls after each meal.
My husband comes home from work and I snap at him for not doing something that I thought should have been taken care of earlier in the day. This can’t be happening again! My snarky, sarcastic comments that come flying out of my mouth have once again hurt the person I love most.
We go through this over and over again. Sarcasm is for humor, not for hurting. I feel awful each time it happens, but nothing seems to change. There are still way too many times that I say things with the intent to push buttons, only to immediately regret them as soon as they have been said. I know better. My husband takes a deep breath, expresses his hurt, yet gives me the chance to learn, no matter how many chances it may take. One day something will click and I will no longer speak before thinking about my words.
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who was tempted in every way, just as we are – yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”
There are many things that I am thankful for, but I am particularly thankful for the grace and forgiveness bestowed on me by my Savior. I need it each and every day. His patience with me is unlike any other. I can make the same mistakes over and over again, and He is always there to lift me back up and help me to start fresh. However, there does need to come a time that I truly learn from my mistakes and no longer continue to make the same ones. If I keep doing the same things over and over, then I need to reevaluate my heart and my life to see if I have been genuinely repentant or just going through the motions when I ask for forgiveness. I am a sinner – I will always mess up – but true growth in my faith occurs when I learn from the second chances I have been given.
How wonderful it is when my son comes to me with tears in his eyes, ready to confess what has been done, but I am able to wrap him into a big hug, kiss his cheeks, and assure him of my love for him. This is what Christ does for us when we go to the throne of grace. Just as I may need to adjust my approach when disciplining my son, God can let us learn from the various consequences of our actions. I often fool myself into thinking that God’s grace is only for the big mistakes, but it’s for our every day trip-ups as well. He doesn’t give up on us, no matter how many chances it may take.
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